16 May 2009

we should all give more hugs

Are we ever content with where we are at, one moment in time?
What about being content vs striving for something better?
But if I'm feeling discontent, when do I ever strive for better? rather than wallow in discontent.

I don't want to be afraid anymore.

I want to be myself again.

It was there.
Just a flicker.
One week of Love Me Dead.
That was Me.

10 May 2009

I'm getting out of here

I'm getting jittery. My plane's tomorrow evening. There's so much to do. I must pack.

I may or may not post on this blog for the next couple of months. Check my Corrymeela blog (or better yet, be a follower!) to read/see what I'm up to. And, yes! there will be pictures.

all that I am
all that I remember
resides there and in you
(pl. pronoun)

and ghostly whispers
rush through "remember me" whence
returned from the Emerald Isle

alas, poor ghost

Now playing: Death Cab For Cutie - Death Of An Interior Decorator
via FoxyTunes
(this song reminds me of the glorious fun of Anon(ymous) rehearsals. Oh, Westmont, I miss you)

09 May 2009

The Chain - Ingrid Michaelson

This song is wonderful. I've been listening to it over and over again. It's so beautiful.

The sky looks pissed.
The wind talks back.
The bones are shifting in my skin and you my love are gone.

My room seems wrong.
The bed won't fit.
I can not seem to operate and you my love are gone

So glide away and so be healed and promise not to promise anymore and if you come around again then I will take, then I will take the chain from off the door

I'll never say, I'll never love
but I don't say a lot of things and you my love are gone

(Chorus X6)

08 May 2009

how COOL is our God?

I'm doing some internet reading (and consequently also procrastinating on packing for Ireland) on theistic evolution. I've come across some interesting stuff. It's been some time now that I've decided that I believe theistic evolution is more correct than creationism, however, my brain was trained as a child and teenager in fundamental creationism. It's very difficult to retrain myself to think in another direction. It's refreshing to gain greater insight into this topic.

Anyway, in my reading, I have discovered a truly fascinating thing about the ongoing creation of the Earth. A new island was formed in 1963 called Surtsey. It's near Iceland and was formed from volcanic activity.

HOW COOL IS THAT? I had no idea that new land forms would still be happening this far from the beginnings of the universe.

06 May 2009

oink oink

Remember a few weeks ago when I was sick from tonsillitis? Basically, what happened is that I went to the doctor and got the antibiotics. A couple days on that and I felt loads better. And I thought that I was completely better except for the fact that my left tonsil still had a big white spot on it that wasn't going away.

:dramatic voice over: Until now...

I checked today and the white spot is gone. It has left a big gapping hole. So I'm thinking, "huh?" Why the big gapping hole? I really had no idea that something like that could happen to a tonsil. What does this mean?

It means that we are all going to die of swine flu.
Because the media told us so.

crazy beautiful -- or maybe just crazy

Tonight at good ol' B&N there was this man in his 50's who walked in the store and set off the "omg someone is stealing a book!!" alarm. I approached him, as we are trained to do, and asked him if he wanted to put what he was carrying on our scanner so they wouldn't go off went he left. He was on his cell phone and he joked with the person on the other end that the pink policewoman caught him (I was wearing a hot pink shirt). As I dealarminized his books, he said to his friend:

"Yes, she's beautiful. And what's more she's wearing a cross, which makes her even more beautiful."

I think that's one of the best compliments I've gotten in a long time. But, he was old enough to be my dad. If he hadn't said the thing about the cross, I might've thought he was a creeper.

05 May 2009

breaking up is hard to do

I think that letting go of a play is like letting go of someone you love. It feels similar to what I imagine a breakup would be like or a death in the family. You spent so much time and energy into this one thing and then suddenly it's gone. And ultimately there's just this terrible ache because you know you've lost something really special that you will probably never have back ever again.

I truly miss Love Me Dead. I had Becky's version of the song stuck in my head all night at work. I want to go back to Santa Barbara and be with people and talk about the play and develop more scenes and complicate the characters lives to the point of death. Love and death.

I miss you Love Me Dead.

It's not the end. There really are more scenes to write. The play needs more to genuinely build to the final death.

But it was really successful. People enjoyed themselves. Next time, after I've written more scenes, I want the torture of disintegration of Roxy and James' relationship to bring tears. And that we would all question what makes our existence as living breathing cognitive humans do the things that we do even when we know it destroys us.

I love storytelling. I love theatre.